Archive for July, 2009

Meals on wheels

記得第一次受惠是當熙悅出世時,其中一個 Regent Spousal Network 的朋友送上美味的晚餐。

當時感到有點 ‘愕然’,心想:「為何無啦啦給我煮飯……」更甚的是廚師並無車,而要勞煩另一位朋友代為送餐。及後才發覺這原來在Regent mom’s network 中是很常見的。 或許中國人靠朋友的觀念不太強,特別是在「生產」這事上,我們都是向家人至親求助…在 Regent有很多 new moms and newborns,而他們大多數都沒甚親人在旁,以致建立了這種守望相助的傳統。

普遍的Regent學生的經濟狀況都甚拮据,為另一家庭提供晚餐的費用未必是每人都能負擔。再者,幫忙的絕不是等閒之輩,差不多所有都是 mom with young kids。 但他們仍然心甘情願、毫無保留、義不容辭的付出。 我真的感動了—一份很到地、很真實的愛就此透過行動傳開去,以致其他人能感受到我們所曾受過的。我相信這可稱為實際行動上的薪火相傳!

有時候真的慶幸能有機會為人付出。

有時候將眼光放開一點,發覺自己有的實在太多,但仍時常在怨。

看多點周圍,看少點自己;看重些別人,看輕點自己。

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Balance

gdwsyy_3446102_0Recently, I have been thinking about the balance between freedom and discipline.

I always thought that I would be a very strict parent as I have a very strict mom.  I think in some ways I still consider as one of those.  But to my surprise, sometimes I found myself more patient than I thought I would be, especially when Alethia is growing older.

I have this constant worry that if being too strict bad for her emotional development and would that decrease her creativity.  I have told Anson several times that I feel bad for not letting Alethia have any choices (like if she could choose what to snack, what to drink and so forth…).  I would put myself into her shoes, and thought that I would be upset if I didn’t get to choose what to snack or what to drink, and am forced to take whatever it is given to me.  Whenever I think this way, I would feel bad for her.  Anson said that they are still too young to be this sensational.  Hm, I somehow agree that kids shouldn’t be given many choices.  But I never know if this is the right approach to raise a kid…

I worry that she would become very suppressive if I am over-controlling, but at the same time, I also worry if I don’t discipline her appropriately, I am failing to be a responsible parent.  And the next question in my mind would be, “so, what is ‘appropriate’?”

Should I start studying child psychology?  Should I start reading books?  In what ways should I equip myself to become a better parent?

There are so much to learn…

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